phew

Let me just sit here and decompress for a second.





This week was supposed to be spring break, correct? 
Let me just say: there was nothing "break" about this week.
I scored a job waitressing every night while school was out, and let me just say: however hard you think waitressing is, it's that. Much. Worse. 
Upside: $$$$$ making bank, man.
Milking the tourists that were here for Iditarod for all that they were worth.
Got a few compliments on how well I was doing, and consumed a large amount of soft serve and fries.
Rosa also worked concessions shifts, did safety patrol in the middle of the nights, watched mushers come in, got mushers signatures, skiied and raced.
I think I might've gone a little crazy from sleep deprivation.
It's okay though. It's really really awesome to know I can get through that.
I feel pretty dang proud. 

I'd like to dedicate the rest of my blog post to talking about something completely different:
The fact that I am now dating someone. 
Crazy. 
After we started going to movies and holding hands and such, people would go up to me and say "I didn't know you had a  boyfriend?? Why didn't you tell me??" Well, for starters, I didn't set out in search of a boyfriend. I'm not dating Troublemaker to fill some void in my life, because I was lonely, or God knows what.
It just... happened. And I don't understand why people expect people to basically BRAG about having a boyfriend, like it is some sort of achievement or something. Yes, he makes me happy, but I didn't set out on a mission to "get" him. It was a mutual thing that just kinda blossomed into a relationship.
My favorite thing about him and us is that we're still so very determined and have our own lives and can function without each other. We understand that we have commitments and sometimes have to do other important things, but we both know that we are so very important to each other. That is so very rare and amazing to find. (:
I've got to go put in my third load of laundry, so I promise I shall write more soon.
I hope.

not with a bang but with a whimper

Not With A Bang But With A Whimper. Not With A Bang But With A Whimper. Not With A Bang But With A Whimper.
Those thoughts that run through your head. That make your heart pound. Not a feeling but a sound.
Down goes the day, and the other seems so far away.
That how you can feel. That's how you can breathe. That's how you can love and give and live and survive. One day at a time. 
Think about it. 

Not With A Bang But With A Whimper.
Do you ever feel on top of the world? I have. Then there's that moment that is a weight. Maybe 200 kilos.  Maybe more. Maybe less. It gets tired to your leg. Or maybe arm. Or maybe neck. It drags you down with such force. I  get whiplash. Emotions all crazy. Crazy crazy crazy.
Do you think many people crash and burn? Everyone. Do most people cry and yelp and whine and weep?
Do most people grunt and endure and deal? Do most people whimper? 

Not With A Bang But With A Whimper.

The world tried to end. Not With A Bang But With A Whimper.

Do I believe it? No.
Does the thought scare me?
Yes.

Not With A Bang But With A Whimper.

2012 is pretty much done.
Not With A Bang But With A Whimper.


I stopped talking to BigMan.
Not much to say about that, but:
drinker/partier. Player. Looking for someone to kiss on New Years?

Not With A Bang But With A Whimper.
Champ's done.
?Dating? someone else.

Not With A Bang But With A Whimper.

Sibling fights, tension.
Sucks.

Time well spent or not spent well enough?
Not With A Bang But With A Whimper.

Happy almost birthday, Blog.
Celebrate Not With A Bang But With A Whimper.

Maybe I should make some resolutions?

Should I?

2012 has been quite the year.

• AWG
• Ski season
• Summer- work
• XC season.
• 2nd place. State. 
• Math at high school.
• Boys, boys, boys.
  Champ, BigMan, Mr.Mess, SisterBrother, Camo, Beast, etc. 
• Self image battling. Not With A Bang But With A Whimper.
• Blogging. 
• Life
• Siblings at home. 
• Thanksgiving. Christmas. 

Not With A Bang But With A Whimper.