Friday, June 22, 2012

Beauty is in the heart of the beholder. -H. G. Wells

It has been done! They're gone!
Well, today was amazing/bad.
I woke up this morning dreading having my mouth propped open for a long period f time, but it actually didn't take too long! The only bad thing about today was that I woke up sickly and feeling like crap, with a throbbing sore throat, with 5 hours of work to look forward to.
But the pain has subsided, I got to hang out with one of my best friends today, it's a weekend, I ate an apple normally, so I feel pretty lucky.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

A good head and a good heart are always a formidable combination. -Nelson Mandela

So today I am going to be completely and utterly honest about some of the people I love and am really close to... All names are changed.
Okay, if any of these are about you, please don't be mad or think I'm trying to get back at you or am trying to change anything, these are just my thoughts I'm too chicken to say aloud and am afraid to think sometimes. If you really don't want to know the complete truth I would look away now.

TallMan: Okay, we're not really close anymore, but I wish we were. We used to hang out all the time, until you  started getting taller and filling out and getting older, and now it seems like you're to cool for me now. I used to have a huge crush on you but you were dumb and would subconsciously flirt with me which drove me crazy. Everyone would tease us and you'd just get red, and it just pushed you away... What happened? I miss you.
Henry makes me feel like such a loser, but I guess I kind of am at the high school. Which I hate, I hate being ugly and awkward.

FunSize: Girl you are like my sister. I love it when I am able too help you get through stuff and cheer you up and help. I miss being around you. You are so convinced you're weird and no very good looking, but dear you are so fucking elegant and sooo fucking pretty you have no idea and it makes me mad and kind of jealous sometimes. You doubt youself so much sometimes, and I wish you could beleive in youself sometimes and really see your amazing genious self.
I know it shouldn't, but it bugs me when you talk about your "Facebook Family" and such, because you would go on and on aobut how wonderful they are and I know I shouldn't, but it makes me jealous that you got that close to them while drifting further from me. I swear, sometimes I am the worst person on the earth.

Ralayne: Gosh you are so gorgeous and I secretly hate you for it. You go on and on aout how big your thighs are and how fat you are, but you are the perfect fucking size and I get so jealous cause you have the perfect thigh size, the perfect wrists that aren't real fat but aren't so weirdly scrawny like mine and your boobs are the perfect size and your hair is so gorgeous and I get so jealous because you don't get many pimples and you look pretty even right after we work out.
But adii girl you drive me crazy because you will completely ignore me sometimes and when we do hang out you don't always listen because you are always on your phone, but you never text me back. I get so jealous when you talk about hanging out with your friends and the fun times you had with all them guys, and it makes me feel like even more or a loser and a low life, because even when you do invite me (which is never, now) I feel like the loser tag-a-long. All them boys always end up liking you, and I can't figure out why no one will notice me that isn't a loser! I am becoming such a jealous bitch it's not even funny. You always talk about Jake being your best friend and stuff and I always get a pang of jealousy (yeah, I'm kind of a jealous bitch) because I so dearly want to get back closer with you, because I see you as my best friend.

BohemianPrincess: Oh, dear Margaret. Sometimes I swear you hate me and hate spending time with me, but you always run up when you see me on front street to give me a hug. I'm glad you got that babysitting job with my co-worker!
Gosh girl you are so tiny and hang out with guys so easily, and you are so shy it's cute. I'm pretty sure you don't realize how beautiful you are. I swear, your hair is like a goddesss's, and your facial shape is gorg.
It is kind of hard sometimes to hang out with you because you don't really like to talk very much, but sometimes that's okay, and we have so much fun!

Helga: Gosh I love you. Like seriously, SO MUCH. I love that you're always game to hang out or run, and you're always ready to run hard, get muddy, or go to the beach with me. I'm going to miss you. I'm going to feel like such a low life while you're gone, because you are one of the main people I hang out with and I'm going to be a hermit on the weeknights. I absolutely love that you are so delighted to see me all the time, it makes me happy.:]
Sometimes you get a little embarrassing or crazy, but that's also one of the things I love about you. It infuriates me sometimes when you and Catherine get really buddy buddy because I end up feeling really left out, which you wouldn't think would be a prolem because I'm already left out of eveything. Your hair is the most gorgeous hair, love. If you ever thought about cutting it, it would look nice in pretty much any haircut. I hate your hair and it's non-frizziness.

TheLady: Oh, lady. You're too old and it's scaring me.  You are so sweet! You are so loud and outgoing and friends with all them guys, and I sort of get jelly. You're getting old and it's not cool because you're leaving! :'( But you keep drifting further from me and I miss being close to you.
Girl, you are so sweet and I love that you listen to my rants and can relate to me with annoying brothers. I hate you for how much raw beauty you have without even trying, and how much you don't give a fuck about what other people think about you.

Please don't be mad about anything I said.
I love you all,

Sunday, June 17, 2012

A man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value of life. -Charles Darwin

So, the last month has gone by in a blur. I am SO thankful for such wonderful family and coworkers.
I got hired to work at the public library ANNND to work for this local day camp-type-thing. Which means I end up working from 8:30-5 with a half hour lunch break, which tires me out... A LOT. It makes it realy hard for me to get to hang out with people during the week and to get my runs in. But I really love my jobs, and I sure do love the money!
I GET MY BRACES OFF FRIDAY!!! Holy crap FINALLY, after three freaking years!  Can I just say finally, again?
I reaallyyyy really can't wait to get them off so when I smile my bottom lip won't do this weird thing where it pushes out and looks huge anymore! Yayy.
Anyways, the past couple weekends I've been getting to hang out with my older siblngs and the interns teaching the day camp, and last weekend we went out for a super fun hike to a waterfall! And then this week we drove out to a beautiful lake and roasted hot dogs and made s'mores and tanned, and then on the way back I  went bridge jumping for the first time! It was a little freaky because I have nightmares about falling, but it was SO MUCH fun. Anyways, I gotta go.